How we behave at a shared table

1. A seat means you're coming

Only add yourself if you intend to be there. Plans change — if yours do, leave the table straight away so someone else can take the seat.

2. Turn up on time, at the restaurant

Tables meet at a public venue at a stated time. Don't move a meal off-platform or ask people to meet somewhere private.

3. Everyone is a diner

There is no host to entertain you and no guest to look after. Nobody is expected to organise, pay for or perform for anyone else.

4. Keep chat about the meal

Table chat exists to sort out logistics and say hello. No harassment, hate, sexual pressure, sales pitches or spam.

5. Settle the bill fairly

Pay your own way unless the table has agreed otherwise before the meal. Don't change the arrangement at the table.

6. Respect the restaurant

It's a real business with real staff. Show up with the number of people you said, tip as is normal locally, and don't blame the venue for our seat counts.

7. Report anything that feels off

Use the report link on any table. It goes straight to our safety team, and the person you report is never told who filed it.

Not allowed — anywhere on ToShareAMeal

These rules apply at meals, Side Quests, in chat, in photos and stories, and in every other part of the platform. Be respectful. The following are not allowed:

• Harassment, bullying, intimidation or threats of any kind.
• Hate, discrimination or targeting anyone because of race, ethnicity, religion, sex, gender identity, sexual orientation, disability, age or national origin.
• Stalking, or contacting someone again after they have said no, left, blocked you or withdrawn.
• Unwanted sexual attention, sexual comments or pressure, sexual misconduct, or touching anyone without their clear consent.
• Fraud, scams, selling, recruiting or other solicitation, and pretending to be someone you are not.
• Sharing someone else's phone number, address, photos or other personal information without their consent.
• Disrupting a meal or event, or retaliating against someone for reporting or blocking.
• Anything unlawful.

Every table page has Report and Block links. Reports are reviewed by people, but they are not monitored live. If anyone is in immediate danger, call 911 first, then tell us.

Not a dating service — respect boundaries

ToShareAMeal is a friendship and community platform, not a dating service. Meals, Meal Seeds, Side Quests and other gatherings are social experiences, and this applies to everyone equally.

• Don't treat a gathering as speed dating or a dating opportunity.
• No unsolicited or persistent flirting, romantic or sexual advances, or pressure.
• Don't push for phone numbers, socials or another meeting, and never share someone's contact details without their permission.
• Saying yes to a meal is not saying yes to romantic attention, touching, swapping contacts or future messages.

Friendships that both people genuinely want, and that grow naturally afterwards, are fine. If someone crosses a line, use Report or Block on the table page; staff review reports (not live) and can warn, suspend or ban, with an appeal route.

What happens if a rule is broken

A person reviews every report by hand. Depending on what happened we may hide or cancel the table, restrict the account so it can no longer start, join or post at tables, or remove it entirely. A restricted account keeps its history — we don't pretend something didn't happen.

We look at what was reported, may ask the people involved for their side, and decide on what we can reasonably establish. Outcomes range from a warning to a temporary suspension or a permanent ban. A suspended or banned account cannot take part in meals, Side Quests, chat or other activity, free or paid, but can still see its status, contact us, use its privacy rights and reach its billing page. You can appeal through the Contact page; appeals are reviewed by hand, without a guaranteed response time, and no refund is promised.

We don't run background checks or identity verification, so these rules and your own judgement are the safety net. If someone is in immediate danger, contact your local emergency services first, then tell us.

Controlling language

English is the controlling language of these policies. Translations are provided to help members understand them. If a translation differs from the English version, the English version controls our interpretation and application of the relevant policy, to the extent permitted by applicable law. Nothing in this provision limits rights or protections that applicable law provides.

This provision does not by itself decide which law governs, which courts have jurisdiction, or the language of any legal proceeding.

Rules and the law

We apply these Rules, together with the Terms of Use, as published in English. Where New York City, New York State, United States federal or other mandatory law applies, that law controls. No platform rule or policy overrides the law.

See “Governing law” in the Terms of Use for which law applies to the Terms.